A special kiss.

What Imma write has nothing to do w the title but i do believe that a kiss is and should always be special, no? :)

Hm as usual, my life here sucks.

However for a time being, it was really nice. I was happy and contented.
I couldn't ask for more. :)

Then fate took its turn again and everything is turn upside down. Everything I thought I knew,
is proven to be exactly what I didn't want them to be.

Another colour turns to gray.

Ha everything seems wrong here. I dont even feel myself around here.
However I am here and however I am at home mcm two different persons .

And ma, I cant wait to be home again. I know baru ja balik haritu,
but if possible I never want to be here.

Cause when Im home, being alone doesnt even bother ni.
Here even when Im surrounded by dozen of people I still feel lonely.


Ha (: fast forward to July please!

xx.

Randomness,

What is the name you wish your parents would named you?
I genuinely believe Suhaila suits me well :)

Do you want to be an adult?
Cant wait to have all the priviledges but nothing beats being young ;)

Would you kill your mother for the sake of fame?
Hell No. Id kill you first if you even thought of asking me to.

Do you care if you look ugly?
Depends on where I am :p

Did you ever laugh when a situation was deadly serious?
Yes. LOL. Im so so sorry .

Do you think school make student smart or immature?
Both.

Would you cheat on your lover over a celebrity who's interested in you?
Lol depends who that celebrity is. HAHA

What's the most sexiest thing on your face?
Erk? I genuinely do not know.

Do you know what is a halitosis? Explain.
I dont, sorry.

When you're angry, what would you do?
Sing.

Are you the low-profile type but is so ultimately talented inside?
I wouldnt say ultimately talented.....

What if you happen to know the date that you're going to die?
Ha insaf lekaih.

Are you a very notorious type but kind inside?
Infact I am. Ceh ceh. ahah

What would you do if you find out that your lover is a vampire?
Gash sexy, shouldve told me earlier

Choose. Kill or kick?
Kick real hard,

Hating myself for this. Haha

 Ah thanks to BEL classes in the lab, I now tend to read all this cheesy lovey dovey stuffs. So cheesy until I blushed reading them -________- Lame I know. Haha ahh so please excuse my lovey mode ;p Here's one of the poems.

Should I give myself another chance?
The chance of loving that particular someone,
Who came in all of a sudden
Bringing great happiness in my life that Ive long lost.

That particular someone
Who says to love me so much.
Has God listened to me?
Is he going to be true?
My heart keeps asking all this questions.
Is he the one to stay?
Is he going to heal my wounds and insecurities in love.

I love when he said;
"I love you and I'm not leaving"
I love everything about him.

Yet I fear everything about it.
I never expected my heart to love again.
At least not anytime soon,

But I am promising myself,
I am going to give myself another chance,
I am going to give you the chance of loving me.

Iloveyou
Thanks for taking this chance with me.


Haa mcm best je if I could give someone this (:
*God please open my heart again*

Day Four

Seven things that cross my mind a lot (in random order)



1.  How do I get this off my chest. How do I tell you and let you know that I love you. and How do I make the others understand?

2.  Aisya Zara Ahmad Faiz

3. DeathDeathDeath

4. MummyDaddy. Maybe because Im far from them, I keep wondering if Ill reach home safe the next time. (traumatize by the recent accident)

5. End of the World really. When and where will I be. Will I have the time to repent

6. Having the chance to study overseas and graduate successfully.

7. GETTING MARRIED. haha Im sorry, tak galak :p It crosses my mind a lot as my brother just lawfully become a husband. So these days banyak berangan moments :)

Hee

<3

Day Three.

Yeah I know it took me so long to do this day three. And I'm not sure whether I know what to write. But lemme try,

Eight Ways to win my Heart

1.  Be with me, all throughout the way. Im as stubborn as a mule. Yes I might be all childish, all paranoid at times, and I suck at expressing my feelings, but having someone who is always there for me, even at times when I know I'm being a huge pain in the butt, would be nice. ahah

 2.  I'm a sucker for cheesy stuffs, I must say. Any random little love thing can melt me to the very core. Sing? Love notes? Chocolates? Yes those types of classic love-expressing stuffs. ahah

3.  Brain, is so sexy! You dont have to be the best student or whatsoever, but as long as you have that eagerness to learn, its good enough.

4. LOVE THE ENVIRONMENT PLEASE? ahah

5.  Make me feel special, even in a group of people, I want to know that you see me, and note my existence. Make me feel there, and needed . Its hard when you're in a large group of people. I, especially, tend to feel invicible.

6. Spend time w me, Im a bit erm weird. I like things like origami, rollerskating, playing kites, picnic, touring, beaches, things like that. Ahah someone whos willing to do all that w me, and not faking the enthusiasm would be reallly nice. Ahah

7.  Respect the elderly. Respect your family. Respect people

8. Be a teensy wiinsy jealous. Hee, but all those im-a-tough-guy act is a major NO NO.

PS,

 Oh and do you realise that no one is even in this w you? -_______- You mcm syok sendiri gila main sorg2, making up all these things in your mind when actually, no one's there to entertain you pun :) ha have fun really.
hee.

Dear Stuckup Lad,

You're like the most pathetic person I've ever met. Like, really. So full of yourself, and you, on your own put yourself on this high pedestal that you don't even deserve to be on. You speak like you're the greatest person in this whole world, but do you even realise how suckish your english is? It makes you look soo soo sad. Im not saying my english is oh-so-perfect but at least I dont go around speaking so high of myself using terrible kindergarden english, really. :)

And Im pretty sure you cant even truly understand what Im writing now huh?

Not feeling so great now huh?

And to think that Ill get crushed by you? HA. You make my day really.

But I think it'd be much better if I get to laugh at your face. In front of everyone.

But then again that'll make me no different from you. So as much as I would LOOOVEE to do that to you, I am not as helpless as you. Going around doing all those stuffs so you can feel better about yourself?

Like seriously, we're not in highschools anymore. People dont give a damn about you. Or they just pretend like they do. Uhuh pretend.

To be honest? All the people who ever talked about you found it so hard to say something nice about you. Hehehe

I guess youd know who you are when you read this ;) and Mark my words, stop messing w my friend's mind or Ill make you regret even being in this place. Two can play at the same game tau? ;)

xx,

Ciya.