In certain scenarios, even me myself knows that what I'm doing is wrong. And that I'm indirectly planning my funeral but ironically, it's heck exciting. To know that you're doing something out of this world. That is crazy and stupid and suicidal. I'm scared and excited all together. Its the kind of feeling you get when you're riding the crazy roller coaster when you know yourself you are terribly afraid of heights. So the after effects will be twice as worse :p ah. I dont know. We'll see how this ends or how far I can go.